Friday, July 06, 2007


If there is one thing my friends talk about way too much (aside from Dungeons and Dragons) is what we would ever do if there was a zombie attack. Now, all of us may be a little off, and perhaps possess less than mainstream social abilities*, but we are all perfectly sane**. We know that zombies do not exist. Yet, we spend time talking about this stuff: figuring out side routes we know so that we can avoid lots of people, we know how to meet up, we've mapped out ways to get to the airport and fly out (if we needed to), we've talked about which buildings would be the best to hole up in***, who would do what, what we would do for water, et cetera et cetera. We all think we'd probably do okay in a zombie invasion, mainly because a) we have a lot of combined survival skills and b) we have more firearms and armor mints in three apartments than Luxemburg.

My mom says that she did that a lot as a young adult as well, only instead of zombies, it was Martians.

I have no idea what drives us to talk about this stuff, but my suspicion is that we talk about this stuff because we won't talk about something else. We talk about end-of-world scenarios because it's more pleasant and fun to think about zombies than terrorists, or our government. It's better think of a break down in society coming from fantasy than something that could actually happen. I think my Cold War era mother did the same thing with Martians: better Martians than the Russians or the US. If zombies don't exist, and Martians don't exist, than society is not going to break down. We don't ever have to mention the idea of society ever breaking down, or face what might realistically happen. But yet...we're prepared. We have a contingency plans. We are strong, and we know we can do. We don't build bomb shelters, we collect guns.

And just like the bomb shelters of our parents, all the guns in the world won't truly protect us from another terrorist attack, or an attack from our government. Our rifles would be like pea shooters against tanks. And no matter how well we know first aid, if we are hit by jet plane we are dead, or probably maimed for the rest of our lives.

*Probably as a side-effect of too much gaming and too little television

**And have the psychiatrists documentation to prove it.

***Right now, it's split between Wal-Mart and Cabalas. Both have ammunition, both have lots of food, both have no windows, and easily re-enforceable front doors, and lots of things to enforce them with. Cabalas has more weapons, but Wal-Mart has more food. In a pinch, we could go to a casino for the same reason.


At 8:29 PM, Blogger Teddy said...

Perhaps you're thinking too deeply? I always enjoyed thinking about zombies because I enjoyed thinking about zombies. And yes, actually, I have thought about terrorist attacks especially given the events on flight 93. In case a building is bombed, what would I do? In case of giant robots, where do I fit in? In case of a fire in a building, how do I get out?

It's really just an extension of survival skills, and even if you don't think about it, thinking about zombies is damn good practice for figuring out what questions to ask and what to look for in such a situation.



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