I got Engaged
As the title of this post suggests, I got engaged last week. No one was more suprised than me, except of course, for maybe my new fiance.
The reactions have been...mixed. Some have been happy for me, some of started crying fearing for who we will become, but most of them have been shocked. Extrodinarily shocked: gaping mouthes, unable to communicate, considered it a sign of the apocolypse shocked.
I shudder to think how our respective parents will act when we get around to telling them.
But the reaction that hurts the most is the idea that I'm a hypocrite for getting engaged. This worries me, because it may be true.
I don't like traditional marriage: it has been a property exchange instead of joining of people, or a religious experience. I'm trying to avoid this by not taking his last name, my father is NOT giving me away, and not getting married in a church. But, is the institution reclaimable? It's currently discriminatory: my gay friends and relatives can't get married while straight me can. There is still a lot of social capital wrapped up in it.
But, on the other hand, I do love him. I want to make a promise to him. Not to mention, when he has to move away in a few monthes for a job, I want to be told if something ever happens to him.
So instead of spending a long post on this, I shall ask you in the feminist blogsphere: is getting married anti-feminist?